“never
trust anyone
who says
they do not see color.
this means
to them
you are invisible.”

-is, by Nayyirah Waheed

We were in the middle of Bible study. Race came up.

She raised her hand.

“I was at a birthday party,” she said, “where I was the only white person. My friend came up to me and said, ‘I guess now you know how it feels a bit, being the minority.’

She went on, “I told her, ‘I don’t see people of color, I just see people.'”

She sat back and smiled.

“It is a sign of privilege,” I said, “to claim not to see color.” That’s all I said, trying to tread lightly. We moved on.

She stopped coming altogether: to the church, the Bible study, all of it.

I sometimes wonder if that’s just what happens when you expose the myth of “non-racist” and invite people to be “anti-racist.” They’d rather just stop showing up instead of doing the hard work.

When we think we’re non-racist is when the hidden biases, the shadow-side of our privilege, are most insidious.